A brother AND a sister

Yesterday I woke up to this statement from A: “I want a brother and a sister. A brother and a sister, that’s what’s going to make me happy.”

Some snippets from our recent conversations about brothers and sisters:

1.
A: Mommy, how do you make people?
Me: In the mommy’s body there is a little thing called an egg and in the Daddy’s body there is a little thing called a sperm. And then they get mixed together in the mommy’s tummy and make a baby that grows in the mommy’s tummy until it is ready to come out.
A: Mommy, but how do you make REAL people?

2.
A: Mommy, can I have a sister?
Me: Maybe. Maybe we will have another baby but you can’t choose if it’s going to be a boy or a girl.
A: But I don’t want a brother, I want a sister. I already have a brother.
Me: Why do you want a sister?
A: So I can play with her. I want to give her a name. You got N and I got Betsy and I want the sister to be called Amanda.
Me: But what if it’s a boy?
A: We’ll call him Sasha. Hehehe. That’s silly right? I want a sister.

3.
A: Mommy, I’m going to help you get the sister. OK? I’ll go with you to the hospital so you don’t have to be there alone with Daddy. And you will lift me up so I can see all the little cribs and I can choose our baby.
Me: It doesn’t really work that way. You get the baby that was in Mommy’s tummy. That’s your baby.
A: But I want to choose. I want a sister. And then they will open your belly and put the baby in. And that’s how it’s going to be.

So complicated.

Gina!

N is learning a lot of words. We’re also working on potty training. He is learning all about his body. He is concentrating very hard on getting his words right. And figuring it all out. This morning when he was sitting on the potty we had this conversation:

N (pointing to his penis): Gina!
Me: It’s a penis.
N: Mommy gina
Me: Right, mommy has a vagina
A: And me too!
N: Penis. Daddy gina
Me: No, N and Daddy have a penis Mommy and A have a vagina.
N: Penis.

When I changed his diaper he pointed to my breasts and said: “Mommy, gina!”. The boy got this sex differences down.

Four

A is four. FOUR! I’m trying to remember the day she was born and although it’s still pretty vivid in my head it feels eons ago. And she is so big. So grown up. So complex. So much a person.

She has waited for her birthday with moderate amounts of patience for about a month. I think it dawned on her that this is going to be a major turning point when her friend O had his 4th birthday party. We marked her birthday on the kitchen calendar but we repeatedly had this conversation: “Is it my birthday today? Is it my birthday tomorrow?”
A had pointed out the things that she wanted for her birthday at the toy store. Polly pockets and a Groovy Girl (thank goodness it wasn’t more Critters!). And we discussed cake – A Dora cake was immediately vetoed by me and we settled on a flower cake.

Birthday party was a huge success thanks to L who organized the activities, the treats and getting the kids going. I think A had a good time. It looked like her friends did. There were no tears. She couldn’t wait to open her presents and sneaked into the house to open the ones she could find.

After nap she came up to me and handed over her pacifier and said she doesn’t need it anymore. That it’s time to give it to Peggy (our designated baby beneficiary). L and I were pleasantly shocked that she just handed it over with no fanfare. We did talk about it for a while, but didn’t really know how it would all come to be. And now it’s gone. And A is four and she doesn’t need (or ask for it) anymore.

And A is amazing. She drives me crazy, but she is truly wonderful. She has grown so much in the past few months. And things just suddenly happen. She draws people with fingers and feet and hair and clothes. And she colors things. And she LOVES to draw. And she can count – really count things, not just say the words. And she is picking up writing. And she can jump, and climb ladders and twirl. And do somersaults. And she asks so many complicated questions I need to think hard about. And she gets all wound up in her emotions and surviving those tantrums without losing it myself is SO HARD. But she is my wonderful girl. My lovely A.